Appearances and all that….

We live in a world where appearance is everything. It goes to such extremes that substance no longer matters to many, just the semblance of something substantial. If one can appear to be benevolent, then they consider themselves, thus, while never bothering to put in the work required to be what they project. Work a term that most trumpet but never actually do, instead they spend half of their lives seeking to avoid any real effort of any kind. They rail against the injustice of the world’s persecution; persecution they believe has been unjustly wrought at the hands of seeds they have sown. A world where everyone is only too happy to imitate the haphazard approach to life that so many seem to propagate.
We live our lives set one against another, all while smiling and pretending to love our fellow man. A fraction of us comprises what is, in effect, a minority. We are the ones that feel born out of time, disconnected phantoms of a long-forgotten past. We glide from one illusion to the next, hoping to find a crumb of truth or anything authentic, but instead, we see more phantasms. Throngs that exist as cheap facades, imitations of what humanity should be, but never entirely made manifest before the eyes. The old souls, the loners, the intuitive, only see wisps of existence. The singular hope that keeps us moving forward is to find that one true refuge, one like no other that sees the world as we do and offers real love and affection, a safe harbor from this perpetual hell of idiocy.
That refuge is out there. It can be found, and once discovered, it will make all of the suffering and the enduring of the cheap dime novel characters that many affectionately call people worth it. Life all too often is like some low budget film; all the class of a wino and even fewer manners. We all have a purpose, it can be a painful journey for those of us that are observant and understand the depths of depravity to which humanity has become submerged. The outcasts, those with a gift not given to all, have a burden, unlike all the rest. We see what others don’t, we feel the things that others can’t or lack to capacity to feel. We spot the lies, the little deceptions played out daily, not just those inflicted upon us but all the ones inflicted upon those we know.
We often can’t communicate what we know to the people we choose to care about, because they don’t understand us. We find ourselves alienated from what many call ordinary people. To these “normies,” we are the crazy ones because we are different, we don’t conform to a society that no longer honors truth and integrity. It pays lip service to all the right ideas, but when it comes time to put up or shut its everyman for himself. Loyalty is just another illusion in a society built upon foundations of sand. This isn’t merely a critique of modern society, but historically as well.
All power structures follow similar patterns. Whether it be a social hierarchy, government, private institutions, and even religious foundations. Each creates adversarial roles among its constituents, ensuring that only the coldest and heartless among us ever rise to leadership roles. You have to be willing to crush the other fellow’s hopes and dreams so that you might realize your own, assuming that your dream is power. My goal has never been power. I dream only for love, acceptance, honesty, and peace every day and a place to hide away from the world with someone worthy of a love as strong as mine. Those of us that have found people difficult, those that are different, we are unique and very worthy of that place of refuge. There is a heart out there that yearns for each of us, for we are different because we were designed that way with purpose. Life is learning, and love is a journey, not merely a destination.

The Naivety of Babes

Life is the summation of experience. To say we have lived isn’t a statement made lightly. We grow old, and as our lives progress, we realize that living is about learning and that learning does not occur without suffering. It is the one constant of the human condition. To truly live is to live with the knowledge that we are all infants grasping at the tendrils of hope just over the horizon, recoiling from the inherent dangers we perceive real or imagined. To honestly exist is to realize that we know nothing of our fellow man and his struggles, we cannot grasp the depths of his insecurities and genuinely understand the turmoil that exists just beneath the surface. It is the folly of youth that seeks to reprimand and tell others right from wrong. Continue reading “The Naivety of Babes”

The Castaway

Life is a pursuit of happiness for some, and the search for money and power for others and these two goals are not always synonymous with each other. We often find ourselves beginning these journeys without ever knowing ourselves as separate and unique individuals. We copy the behavior that we like and disregard that which is displeasing in other people. Such behavior while viable is a shortcut to existing within the human framework we call society. Living in this manner is detrimental to personal happiness and identity. We all view the world through slightly different lenses, colored with the hue of our own biases and desires. Finding oneself among so much fabrication and betrayal is difficult and a very different journey for each person. Continue reading “The Castaway”

Reality:What is it really?

We have all got our notions of what constitutes reality. Philosophy tells us that reality is both subjective and objective. Science seems to embrace the objective nature of reality while acknowledging the limits of our perceptions. The objective is, of course, that which we can see, touch, and manipulate physically. Subjective reality relies on how each perceives the world based on personal bias, previous experience, and often what the viewer expects to see. Reality is far more complex than the average person cares to entertain within the limited scope of their existence. Instead, the vast majority are content to progress towards eventual extinction never questioning why or how they came to be or what if any meaning can be ascribed to life as we know it.

Continue reading “Reality:What is it really?”

The Irredeemable

The heart goes where it wills. We often find ourselves led about as if controlled by puppeteers, due to the desires of our heart. The heart is big and all-encompassing in its capacity for darkness and light. We fill our hearts with love and despair, hate and disgust. A world where good and evil can exist within one soul, and where the greatest acts of love and evil can be carried out by the most malevolent and benevolent of us all. The soul becomes imbalanced within many of us, and we lose our way. Some find their way back from the encroaching darkness in time to save themselves from deliberate destruction. Many of those that darken the path to hate and despair never find their way out and self-destruction and destruction of those around them become as automatic as drawing breath. Continue reading “The Irredeemable”

Progressive Retrogression

Existence is a minefield, dotted with pitfalls aesthetically differing yet familiar in their consistent and constant barrage upon our consciousness. From birth we strive forward unsure of our place in the world, believing that we might gain sufficient wisdom with which to avoid our previous follies. Instead, as creatures of habit, we find ourselves drawn by invisible forces towards repeated violations of our well being. As we each differ slightly, we fall into traps seemingly constructed just for ourselves. We’ve been told that experience is the greatest teacher and we are but unwilling students. Still learning to avoid the desires of our souls that so often lead to calamity is a struggle without end.  Continue reading “Progressive Retrogression”

Who can you rely on?

Our existence is a trial from which there is no escape. We all lose in the end. Time ravages all it touches from the highest peaks to lowest valleys. The human condition is one of continuous degradation at the hands of time, other people, and frequently ourselves. We feel besieged from every angle, and even imagine a multitude of horrors that never manifest creating a constant sense of urgency in our lives. Time, an illusion created by humanity ironically becomes his greatest enemy. Throughout our meager existence, we seek allies with which to face adversities that have been primarily forged by our fellow human beings. Continue reading “Who can you rely on?”

The Old Familiar Road

We enter this world by no choice of our own. Once we become cognizant of ourselves, we greet the world with wonder and fascination. We are not quite human in the sense we have yet to be touched by the evils of this world. We view everything through the lens of naivety. We are encouraged once we can communicate to dream big and dream often. We imagine what we will become in a world that to us seems so full of hope and love. The imagination of a child is beautiful and doesn’t deserve to be spoiled by the harsh realities that persist in life. That comes later and far too often. Continue reading “The Old Familiar Road”

The Mediocre

Life is spent pursuing happiness and security for one’s self and family. We fight daily not in open warfare but compete with our fellow humans for valuable resources. It would simply be a case of survival of the fittest but for one small detail. Sentimentality that is procured through relationships often forged as a means of advancement. Far to often hard work is looked over in favor of those that say the right thing and blow the proper amount of smoke up the right orifices. We find ourselves surrounded by individuals that in a truly equal opportunity world would be living on the street begging for handouts. Those of us that don’t pander to sentimentality and don’t seek to ingratiate ourselves to those in power through conversation but through hard work often find ourselves left behind.  Continue reading “The Mediocre”


I’m an Army veteran and I’m proud of serving my country. It is difficult for some to understand what branch loyalty means to a veteran. I’m Army through and through and would be offended if I were ever described in any other way. I’ve encountered members of some branches that don’t seem to understand the concept of honor and loyalty. I can only guess that it is because given the option they chose the cowards way and hid from any actual danger except the danger presented by their sub-par training and intellect. I won’t mention any specifics but let’s just say when you are more of a danger to yourself than the enemy some reevaluation should take place! Continue reading “Service”